Agape
by Lucitae
Summary: Based off of the D18 fanfiction 'Butterfly' this story tells the continuation of Dino's marriage life, not to Hibari.


**Agape**

**February 23**  
>Oh. What should I write in here? Umm… hi? Wait this is a diary. Well, it's my 18th birthday today and I have officially taken over my family. I think that's it. Bye~<p>

**September 1**  
>It's been seven years since I wrote here right? I have much to say and no one to speak to. Being a boss is hard, even worse when you are female. They've been trying to force me into a marriage for quite some time. I just met him and within a few days we are now engaged. If it wasn't because our family was so small… or the fact that we need an heir, I would have rejected this. I have been reduced from a boss to a mere vessel for production.<p>

**September 23**  
>Tomorrow, I shall be wedded. To a man who doesn't love me, to a man who I do not love. But merely thrown together due to-<p>

Sorry for the sudden break. The fiancé has just visited me. Queer that someone would skip his bachelor's party isn't it? But I couldn't refuse him, it's pouring outside and he had a desperate look on his face, like a child. I don't know if it was because of how he miserable he looked, I reached out and patted his blonde head. Surprisingly, the hair was quite soft… even if it was dampened by the rain. I wonder if he came out on such a rainy day so that he could catch a cold and in hopes of postponing the wedding. Anyways, he apologized, saying that he could never love me, since he had given someone else his heart. He went on to say that he was sorry for being selfish and that he couldn't and wouldn't divorce me… meaning that I would be stuck with a man who would never love me forever. At that point I nearly laughed. We were the same weren't we? Using each other. I simply told him that I wouldn't mind, after all, the most important thing for me was my family, not something as fickle as love. The latter I did not voice, of course, but I told him we could try to be friends, best friends, friends with benefits.

**September 25**  
>It's currently early in the morning, he… I suppose I ought to address him as my 'husband' now, is still asleep. We, consummated our marriage… or whatever that is called. I had to confide in this book… just had to. I had this haunting feeling about the person he 'loved'. If it was a female… he would have married her right? I'm not familiar with Japanese… but surely 'Kyouya' is a male's name right? No, I'm not disgusted, just pitying him. Perhaps 'Kyouya' didn't love him… or perhaps his duty to the family outweighed his love? Whatever it is… it has nothing to do with me but: I wonder what person 'Kyouya' is. What type of person could leave another at the brink of ruins? Pining away for the other?<p>

**December 24**  
>This is the first Christmas about to be spent together. Just a few hours ago, it was my formal debut as "Cavallone's wife". I hate it. I hate the fact that I would no longer be recognized as "me", no longer be called by my name and instead be known as someone's 'wife'. But that aside, tonight, I also saw 'Kyouya'.<p>

It was my husband who first noticed him, face paling yet still adopting his cheerful smile before greeting the aloof man, calling him: "Hibari Kyouya". What surprised me the most was that he didn't call him by the first name and that the man who was called… flinched. I had the vague imprint that it was a heartbreak caused by the raven-man in front of me.. but that didn't seem to be the case. His fists were clenched tightly, sweat forming between the fingers… did it mean he still…had feelings?

Men often scoff at woman's '6 sense' but that was telling me that this man hasn't quite… and that coward of a husband ran away to the bathroom early… if he was going to be that nervous, then why call in the first place. Idiot. And so we were forced to hold a casual conversation… as casual and normal as it could be between the wife and the previous lover. But I could understand why my husband loved this raven-haired man. He was beautiful, with airs of grace. At first glance, perhaps unattainable but there was just something about this man that you couldn't help but look at a few more times… and start liking him.

* * *

><p><strong>February 25<strong>  
>Can you believe it I sensed that <em>something<em> was different when I started to get nauseous and stuff. Guess what? I'm pregnant. I- can't… I don't know how to deal with this, apparently he doesn't either… everyone is delighted by the news except for the parents… funny isn't it? It's not like we don't but… more like it's so soon. I'm not prepared… WHAT IN THE WORLD SHOULD I DO?

**September 10**  
>Yeah. I gave birth. The whole process… I would love to forget about it. By the way, we named him Alessandro: protector of the people.<p>

**September 24**  
>We celebrated our first anniversary. Does it really need elaboration? I guess… well we survived the first year right? He's just a good friend, nice to be around, sweet and attentive. Very charismatic as well, you could see that by the amount of people who 'follow' him.<p>

But constantly hiding under a mask.

**October 17**  
>I found a key to a house, not ours though. I wonder whose?<p>

**October 18**  
>I returned the key to his attendant yesterday, yet the attendant quietly gave it back to me and even told me where it was located. And so I went there with Alessandro, not wanting to be away from my young child for too long. Unexpectedly there was someone else there.<p>

In the middle of the garden, completely filled with white flowers, leaving the air with the taste of… daisies, stood one man. Yes, it was that raven-haired man I saw at the party. Clearly, this house wasn't meant for anyone else but him, I felt like a trespasser. And so I went up to him and apologized. What shocked me wasn't that he glared at me when I disrupted his peace; it was the sudden softening of the glance that shocked me. That moment, I was sure that he still had remaining feelings, no matter how small or withering it may be.

And that made me start planning for the future.

**November 9**  
>If both sides have feelings toward each other...<p>

They should be brought together...

Right?

**December 25**  
>2nd year of Christmas: glad that the entire household was in festivity, even with some troubles that might be looming in the future.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>February 4<strong>  
>Heh. For his birthday we threw a surprise party. The facial expression… epic. I even have a picture. Blackmail forever.<p>

**February 23**  
>I nearly forgot my own birthday, if it wasn't for my attendants who reminded Dino. It's not like it matters anyways… 29 and growing older by the day. Gawd! I'm about to be middle-aged!<p>

**November 18**  
>Guess what? I'm pregnant again... My stomach is huge already, I'm worried it might come out earlier than I expected. The doctors are guessing this is going to be a Christmas baby.<p>

**Christmas 26**  
>I'm glad someone handed me this damn diary. Rumors said that the second child would be smoother than the first. HA! All lies. I went into labor for who knows how many hours and finally gave birth 4 AM Christmas morning. A gift from God indeed… so he… I mean we… named him Giovanni: God is gracious. Yes, yes. Gracing the Cavallone house with two strong boys. My duty is done. But God is gracious, giving me a husband who… is at least kind and caring. Maybe I should be like God, a selfless being: instead of my own happiness, seeing the one I treasure, truly happy should be the best, right?<p>

* * *

><p><strong>January 1<strong>  
>All I hear outside my door are maids cleaning up the mansion and whatnot. The noises have been there since I woke up because Giovanni started crying. Seriously? There's a newborn trying to sleep here! What were they thinking? Celebrating new years by holding a PARTY to celebrate the fertility of the house? Can they just, for once, consider how tiring it is for me? For the kids? At least everyone enjoyed it. The entire Vongola came by the way, not surprising actually. More awkwardness and whatnot. I think it's time to set my plan into action.<p>

**February 27**  
>I tracked Hibari down. I had a few things to talk to him about. Well I didn't actually… I requested Vongola Decimo to send him to aid me. The expression on his face… hilarious. After a small chat I told him to come tomorrow, to the mansion, to babysit my kids. Once again the expression was livid. I'm sure someone would get an earful… but it was the only way to do it.<p>

**February 28**  
>And so a fuming skylark came to our door. I had the urge to tease him, but getting him to like my children was the priority anyways. I'm pretty sure he didn't see the point in protecting children when there were larger threats in the mafia world… but he didn't know anything.<p>

Like I expected, one of the enemies attacked our household that day. The bucking horse was away on a separate mission, a decoy, I suspected. I had to hire help, even if I hid with the children our home would be destroyed… everyone's home would be. At the same time, we needed aid but it was impossible to ask all of our allies so I chose the strongest one, Hibari Kyouya. As reluctant as he was at first… he protected our household. I watched him, with two tonfas in his hands and a box weapon from time to time could fend off 20 or so assassins. I saw his purple flames, felt his murderous aura, and tasted fear on my tongue.

This was my husband's student, this was his love, this is what is needed to protect a household. The board is now set, time to move the pieces into play.

**September 10**  
>We celebrated our son's 3rd birthday. This time a whole party, with our allies present. Lately, all of our allies, especially the Vongola frequent the parties. Quite convenient.<p>

**December 24**  
>Another Christmas Eve party. I hope it isn't too obvious that Mr. Hibari hangs around our house too often. The awkwardness between the two has lessened… after all he comes often due to my requests, not that anyone dares touch the household anymore. The casualties from last time were too high. But not only that, the children seem to take a liking to him as well… probably impressed by the 'pwetty' purple flames. They aren't interested in their father's orange ones or my blue ones. Besides, they like 'Mr. spiky ball' more. Mr. Hibari on the other hand… as far as I've researched seems to like little animals and I have a creeping suspicion that he likes my children like animals. Ahh well… we'll just wait and see right?<p>

* * *

><p><strong>April 1<strong>  
>I thought he was kidding about training my children. Tips for the future: never underestimate how far the skylark can go. There is no such thing as April Fools in his dictionary. I learned that when I saw Alessandro being dragged out and in his tiny hands, placed weapons. He's a freaking child for crying out loud. Scary, demonic, I wish I knew this side earlier. Great, now a headache is setting in.<p>

**September 24**  
>5th year anniversary. Another party. Why is it always a party of some sort? But for the 5th year… he bought me a diamond ring. I'm not a materialistic girl, but seeing that ring, my heart… it hurt. I wonder why? Perhaps it's because I have developed those feelings I have scoffed at long ago.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>January 2<strong>  
>Festivity and more festivity. But that's not important. Yeah I know I haven't been updating much… that's the issue. I learned that I have been assigned a mission to take out a family. Small but strong. It might be the perfect chance… I have hidden this from all of them except for my closest subordinate. I have only a few months to plan this.<p>

**March 30**  
>I have finally located their base. For now that spot will go under surveillance in case they move.<p>

**April 21**  
>It's a bit early to do this but... for the last few night, I haven't been able to sleep...<p>

So today I finally confronted HIbari.

I told him that if anything /ever/ happened to me, he was to take care of mine and Dino's children. He had that look of disbelief and shock... but I think he might've understood. He's gotten attached to Alessandro and Giovanni as well during these past few months anyways.

I told him:

"Thank you for everything. I'm sorry to trouble you, but please... Treat them as your own. If anything happens, they are yours to take care of with Dino."

I'm afraid it might have given too much of my plans away, but it's too late to go back now.

... I just needed to tell him this now. I'm afraid that if I continue to drag this 'till the last minute, I might become selfish.

And unable to follow through with my plan.

**May 12**  
>Farewell my diary. This will be my last entry as I have prepared for a few years already. I had a lot of memories stored in here, I'm glad I had a space to leave my words on. To anyone else who has pried through my privacy, shame on you. Leave this collection alone. There is no need to care anymore. I am too far to reach for.<p>

Ciao.

* * *

><p>The blonde boss waved the diary angrily in front of his wife's subordinate's eyes "What is the meaning of this?" he demanded. He had just learned of her death a few hours ago and was flipping through her belongings when he came across this diary of hers. The subordinate paled seeing his master's book between the blonde's fingers.<p>

The subordinate then composed himself "That is not for you eyes to see. Please respect my lady's property."

The boss glared at the other one "Have you found her body yet?"

His wife's subordinate shook his head "No. There were traces of blood marks out the door, which leads us to guess that she dragged herself out or someone else did. But from the amount of blood… it was probably lethal"

"Why would she…" he trailed off, the bucking horse was unable to finish his sentence.

The messenger took this time to hand him a letter, one stained with bloody fingerprints "It's from the lady, left on the table, addressed to you. But before you read it, I shall explain her decision." Cavallone nodded his head, after all this man in front of him was his dead wife's right-hand man. "In order to decrease harm in the family, she went by herself into this…" he refused to use 'suicidal mission' "dangerous task. The enemy was stronger than she had expected, so she took a few fatal blows. From the inspection in the area it seemed as if it was a blood bath, the enemies were obliterated..." he trailed off. That was enough, and now it was time to let the blonde boss read the last letter.

To Dino,

By the time you read this, I am probably long gone. I'm sorry I made such a selfish decision, but it was necessary for the future. Someone had to make a sacrifice. I can't see my family be put into harm, nor can my children live without a father. I have made necessary arrangements. My children will live happily and grow strongly under his care, under your joint care. I entrust my sons to you and Hibari Kyouya. Don't you dare shed a tear for me. I made this choice when I found out that the both of you still had mutual love for each other. But without an heir nothing was possible.

Now my duty is done, it is time for your happiness to begin. You've been a loving husband to me for all these years. I was blessed. Thank you.

Now it's your turn to have your happiness. Accept what I have given up to give you, live happily, for me.

Remember the night before our wedding when we vowed we would just be best friends? It took me long hard years to figure this out. Sorry this is so late but…

I love you.

~~~Epilogue~~~

A woman in a wheelchair glanced at the couple and smiled gently. A certain blonde she knew and loved, and a shorter, raven male by his side, hand in hand. Laughter filled the air, and smiles were forever present on their faces. Not far away from the sweet couple were two grown teenagers… her pride, her jewels that she had entrusted to others… no longer hers.

"Madam?" that voice snapped her out of her trance and she smiled at the caller. "We should go now. It is getting cooler and your health might be affected" the servant explained. She nodded and as she was about to be rolled away a voice stopped them.

"HEY! Madam! Stop right there please" an adolescent boy ran up to greet him. Shocked as she was, she composed her face and smiled brightly at the boy. "Yes?"

"I've seen you… you've been watching us for a while. Do you have something to say? If so, you are welcome to enter the Cavallone manor!"

The elder woman looked at the mansion behind them, shook her head and then looked back at the boy. He had his father's blond hair, but her straightness. And those emerald eyes resembled her. She smiled softly "It is no longer somewhere I can go to. But do tell them this… 'I was here'" before nodding at her servant, indicating that they would go. With one long, last glance at the happy scene, she smiled.

"Farewell."

* * *

><p><strong>Author Notes:<strong>

Source of inspiration: At first it to be a sequel to Butterfly (D18) but I decided to make it a stand alone one. Though most of the dates are based off that one. I wanted to write a happy ending to their poor true love. On the other hand, I also wanted something sad. Hopefully it wasn't too bad.

Second source of inspiration was Beyonce's I Was Here. I loved the lyrics and focused on that in my epilogue.

This fanfic is dedicated to my Baka-saur. ^ ^


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